Where Do I Go To Use the Restroom?

Photo by Mick Haupt on Unsplash

One of the worst things about NYC is easily the lack of restrooms. I can handle the crowds of people and the stench of summer subways. I can even endure the excessive honking. (I was recently at the LA airport, and there was no honking. It was very uncomfortable.)

What can’t I handle? Spending the day in the park or exploring the city and needing a restroom. Where are they?

If you go to other countries, public restrooms are everywhere. You pay a small price and gain access to a nice place to do your business. They are clean. They are accessible, and sometimes they are even free. Come to NYC, however, and you find yourself looking at a mess. It’s either a restroom that has been forgotten about or never cleaned. And if it is open it has long lines or you’ve had to beg a private establishment. How does one manage?

The easiest by far is the public option. Many of the parks have small restrooms, and some of them are actually clean. The one at Bryant Park is pretty nice, and if you brave the long line, it can be a central place to go. The line gets to be a bit too long during the holiday markets, but other times it’s okay. I can also attest that the one down at Pier 45 Riverside Park is also very nice, having been there myself.

Sadly, the city closed many of these park restrooms during Covid. The city has started to open a few up again, but many were neglected and fell into disrepair. It should be noted that this sad fact was happening before Covid. I will never forget the time I went for a morning jog (I know. It’s a surprise to me as well. But sometimes I do work out). I was near Prospect Park at Grand Army Plaza, and I had to go. There is a public restroom by the entrance. It was bad. It was an emergency, so I used it, but not without leaving a piece of my soul there. That experience still haunts me to this day. But check it out. They might have cleaned it since then.

Then there are the public restrooms in the subway. I don’t know if they have ever been open. I’ve only seen the barricaded and locked doors locked for years. Gaging by the smell of the subways and cars, I’ll wager that the restrooms have been closed for a long time. On the NYCGO webpage, the city says hubs like Grand Central have public restrooms. Fulton Street Station, however, is shut. I know because I asked a lovely cop if it was open. She sadly told me, “no.” Speaking of cops, the NYCGO page also states you can request to use the restrooms at the New York City Police Department Stations. I am going to try this one out.

You can also hit up a department store. Places like Macy’s and Bergdorf Goodman are large enough stores that it won’t look like you just came into the store for the loo. Its a maze just trying to find them though. Personally, I always feel guilty when I use a place just for its bathroom. If you go to Bergdorf Goodman, the toilets are on the same floor as the perfume, and the vendors are pushy. I know this because I took my dad there. He got stuck chatting with a vendor, and she convinced him to try on four different colognes. My father doesn’t even wear cologne. He politely pretended to like its smell when clearly he did not. My father also made sure to comment loudly on the price of everything in the store.

Photo by Wilhelm Gunkel on Unsplash

Hotels are also an option. Technically they are supposed to let you use the restrooms in the lobby. But that depends on the mood of the front desk. You can also pull the, “I’m a guest here” And not stop walking. But it helps to have a vague idea of where the restroom is. I usually have no issue because I admire the architecture for a bit before asking the front desk. Make sure to say something nice first.

Most restaurants will let you go if they aren’t busy or you ask them really nicely. To be fair, at some of the restrooms in the bar or restaurant you are a paying customer in need of some serious love.  There are stores as well. Most delis or convenience stores will let you use one. You might need to buy water first, but hey, stay hydrated.

I’m not the only own to bemoan this hardship. Someone at Google Maps must have had a hard time because now you can search for Public Restroom on the app. It brings up a list of them. There’s also this niffy map I discovered that I keep bookmarked. nyrestroom has been a lifesaver. The site has over 1000 restrooms listed on the map, including public, fast food, and hotels. And it’s a Google Map, so you can drop one of those little yellow people and get a good look before you walk all the way over.

I wish I had found this map earlier because it will make my summer adventures so much more relaxing. At the end of the day, I don’t really mind which porcelain throne I use, as long as it’s accessible and cleaned sometime in the recent week. I hope that my journeys with the Johns of NYC help you find the perfect restroom for all your needs.